It makes you wonder who came up with laws this bizarre to begin with. Is there usually not a driving force to cause laws to go into effect? Protesting, picketing, staging walk-out’s at the city council meeting? Oh, to be a fly on the wall during the time that some of these were created.
- It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street as long as you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.
- Incestuous marriages are legal.
- Boogers may not be carelessly thumped into the wind.
- Doors of all public buildings must open outwards.
- It is illegal to sing in a public place while wearing a swimsuit.
- The term "motor vehicle" was revised to exclude swamp buggies, as it was the primary mode of transportation.
- It's illegal to carry an ice cream cone in your back pocket on a Sunday. Monday - Saturday, you're golden.
- In Athens-Clarke County, if you must read your favorite book to your buddy in public, it has to be done before 2:45 A.M.. We can't have you getting rowdy during the shenanigans of "Bridge to Terabithia" at 3:00 A.M..
- Also in Athens-Clarke County, mule owners may not allow their animals to traipse all over town unsupervised.
- If you steal an alligator, you can face up to ten years in prison
- Forget your pants catching on fire. If you make a false promise, you could face up to a year in jail.
- If you intend to rob a bank, it's illegal to shoot a water pistol at the bank teller.
- Private citizens may personally arrest any person that disturbs a church service
- Cattle rustling is punishable by hanging (because we don't play around in the south.)
- In Tylertown, it's unlawful to shave in the center of the main street. Please do that on the sidewalk.
- Elephants may not be used to plow cotton fields.
- When having sex, the shades must be closed, and you must remain in the missionary position.
- If you are in possession of weed, crack, cocaine, heroine, or any illegal substance, you must pay taxes on them.
- Dogs cannot clique into groups of three or more without a permit signed by the mayor.
- You may not allow your farm animals to place their hind legs in your boots.
- You are not allowed to keep a box of tissues in the back of your car.
- You're allowed to beat your wife as long as it's on a Sunday, and it's done on the courthouse steps.
- When you're rollin' up to a four-way intersection in a vehicle not driven by a horse, you must stop 100 feet away from the intersection and fire your gun into the air to warn horse traffic of your approach.
- You cannot keep your horse in the bathtub. Sorry. Find somewhere else for him to go.
- You are not allowed to sneak onto someone else' farm and milk their cow.
- The Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it has the formula for making homemade beer.
- If two trains arrive at a railroad crossing at the same time, each must come to a full stop, and neither can proceed until the other has gone. (Clearly, the person who put this law into effect, found an Encyclopedia Britannica).
- A male may have sex with an animal as long as the animal doesn't weigh more than 40 pounds.
- If you plow a deer down with your car (or any animal), you may take it home for dinner. (If it's under 40 pounds, yes, you can still have sex with it).
- You absolutely may not whistle while underwater.